When I was young, a popular question to throw around in a social group setting was, "What's your most embarrassing story?" I've heard some real doozies, ranging from vocal failures to walking failures to bladder failures. (If you want to know mine, just ask-- but I'll warn you now, it literally involves an Asian massage parlor.)
But technology has evolved, and thus so has embarrassment. 'Communication' used to mean face-to-face talk, landline phones, or even written letters. Now we have Facebook, texting, and tweets (which could, I guess, be viewed as 140-character typed 'letters' to the whole world).
In short, there are so many new and exciting ways to make yourself feel like an idiot.
Text at your own risk
Side effects include blushing, apologies, isolation, tears, and unfulfilled pledges to never again use technology
As communication becomes more public, instantaneous, and permanent, mistakes become more costly. And perhaps no mistake is funnier (depending, of course, on whether or not you're part of the story) than the phone contact mix-up.
Here are a few categories of 'mistexts' and some possible solutions. When possible, I've included real stories, though in almost all cases I changed the names.
1. You're so vain, you probably think this text is about you. Oh wait, it is.
Yeah, pretty long title for a category of text. This is when you write a text about someone and accidentally send it to that person instead of the intended recipient. This is probably due to the fact that you typed the text before entering the recipient. Thus, the person's name is on your mind when you absently enter the (wrong) recipient.
Examples:
Joe -> Sally
"Dude, I have no idea how to break up with Sally... she's not going to take it well!"
Jane -> Bill
"When will Bill get the picture that I'm NOT INTERESTED in him?!"
Solution:
Always, always establish the recipient of the text before you type its content. Then, if there's anything remotely sensitive in the text, double-check the name before clicking Send.
2. Same name, different person
This texting faux pas exists because we live, just to take the good old U.S. of A. as an example, in a country of over 300 million people with only about 5,000 commonly used first names. [Fun fact: by a generalization of the pigeonhole principle, there must be at least one first name shared by over 60,000 people.]
Irrelevant counting arguments aside, we all know a bunch of Jo(h)ns and Sara(h)s. This makes it all too easy to text the wrong person.
Examples:
My ex-girlfriend's sister texting me [instead of some 'Jon'] excitedly that my ex just got engaged.
My (different) ex-girlfriend's mom calling me while trying to reach her daughter's new boyfriend [also named 'Jon'].
Yeah. Ouch.
Solution:
Use last names in your cell phone. It's so obvious.
3. Texts of Vice
I have no experience with either drunk texting or 'sexting'. But just imagine what happens when you combine alcohol or sex with error #1 or #2 above. That just cranks the awkwardness amp up to 11.
Examples:
Um, I'm pretty much going to let you use your imagination. But think of this-- even if you send this stuff to the right person, it's still probably going to be embarrassing someday. And unlike a regrettable memory, which fades with time, texts are basically around forever.
Solution:
Stop it.
Leave a comment
but don't text it
Have you been on either end of an awkward texting error?
Do you have any good texting tales?
What's your most embarrassing story?
Jon
Jon, this is why we use an elaborate scheme of code names in our texting.
ReplyDeleteJon, I would maybe enjoy hearing about what to do when you have failed to prevent the above situations and accidentally enter into one of those moments of extreme awkwardness. How do you wriggle your way out of those?
ReplyDeleteMm, Cunningham, I got this. Though I am in fact generally #winning, texting is the one area of my life in which #allIdoisfail.
ReplyDeleteIn the event of...
1. Apologize immediately. This is more or less effective based on the circumstances, but you can almost never go wrong with a sincere apology. And also, a reiteration that you are nonetheless still not interested. That last part is important. Do not let the apology be the window to the door that you just very effectively, if accidentally, closed firmly. God can use our mistakes, friend.
2. Immediately pray that the same-named, wrong-numbered person you just texted does NOT have your number in his/her phone. Then stay quiet about it. The less people who can link your blunder to you, the less people to help the guy figure out it's you. If he/she does have your number, you're screwed...revert to #1.
3. In my experience, dealing with vice-texting can be done in two steps. Step one: Become a Christian. Of course, step one is fairly ineffective if not paired with Step Two: live as a Christian. Seriously, I haven't had to deal with the fall-out from a vice text in years, and I'm thinking that has everything to do with my conversion. Not only am I motivated away from vices. I'm additionally motivated not to be drunk and/or amorous around a phone that possesses the names/numbers to a number of people employed as pastors or employees of various church/parachurch organizations.
So glad I could share the Asian massage parlor experience with you.
ReplyDeleteI've pulled a major email mistake. I was setting up a surprise birthday party for Beth in conjunction with one of her friends. There was limited room at the party site, so I made an A and B list of people for Beth's friend to invite. I sent Beth's friend all the email message. I thought the easiest way to get their email addresses would be to type them into the CC box, so they would just pop up and I could cut and paste them into the body of the email. Well, instead of cutting, I copied and didn't delete the email addresses from the CC box. Needless to say, I sent out the A/B list to all the people who were on the A/B list. Uh. That was awkward....
-Wes
I actually recieved a random text this weekend, it was a picture of a girl who texted me I assume. I wouldn't classify it under case # 3 it was a picture of her making a goofy face and standing with some strange arm posture (I imagine one would make this gesture if you just revealed a magic trick and said tada). Anyway I thought the best way to notify her that it was a wrong number was simply to replicate the picture myself and text it back to her along with "Did I do that right?... Wrong Number Sorry.".... She has not since replied :(
ReplyDelete#2 has happened far more often than it should, because you're right, the solution is obvious. My problem is that it's happened at least 3 times, but ALWAYS with the same person, my friend Amanda. She's changed numbers millions of times, I only have her first name, and the formatting of my contacts got screwed up when I got a new phone...all of these reasons have led to disaster, and I've texted a mysterious Amanda 3 TIMES who ALWAYS answers very pleasantly that I got the wrong person, and I STILL have no idea who she is. And consequently, I haven't talked to my real friend Amanda in months.
ReplyDelete