Not all of you are sports fans, I realize. So I'm expanding the appeal of this post by making use of an extended Monopoly metaphor. Conveniently, the metaphor doubles as an actual business idea, so if any of you is an entrepeneur...
Imagine an NFL Monopoly board game. This probably actually exists, so if you've played it, feel free to imagine the real NFL Monopoly board game. Instead of street properties from Atlantic City, you would buy football team franchises as you make your way around the board.
For a very low fee you could buy the brown properties right after Go, like... the Browns. Eventually you would make it all the way to the blue properties, where teams like the Colts and Steelers would await you.
There would still be Chance cards, but Community Chests would be swapped out for fun cards called "Take James Harrison's Money." Each card would have something like this:
- James leads with the crown of his helmet -- collect 25K
- James throws QB to ground unnecessarily -- collect 20K
- Repeat offender! -- collect 10j thousand dollars from James Harrison's bank, where j is the number of Take James Harrison's Money cards that have been revealed so far
The real issue -- comparing fines
I'm not mad that the NFL is cracking down on hits that unnecessarily endanger other players. What I'm mad about is the total lack of sense in meting out these (seemingly arbitrary) punishments. For instance, here are Harrison's 2010 fines to date, along with the other major fines this year:
Harrison awesomely does what is essentially a WWE move on Vince Young: 5K
Harrison blindsides Massaquoi: 75K
Harrison late-hits Brees: 20K
Harrison blows up Fitzpatrick: 25K
Richard Seymour punches Big Ben in facemask: 25K
Cortland "terrible human being" Finnegan starts fight after play: 25KAndre Johnson destroys Finnegan in retaliation: 25K
I need hardly make an argument that this is unfair, because it pretty much speaks for itself. Harrison has been penalized for playing football. A few of his plays have been deemed overly aggressive/reckless (and I agree the hit on Massaquoi was scary). In my opinion, which admittedly counts for nothing (not even 2 NFLopoly cents), the hit on Fitzpatrick was perfectly legal and worthy of football praise.
But the other players were penalized for being outright violent -- while not playing the actual game. I mean, seriously -- one player is playing football too hard/dangerously, and the others are punching people's faces between plays.
A tangent for one is lonely
What do you think? Part A: Are the fines and penalties (which I didn't even mention!) on Harrison fair?
What do you think? Part B: Thoughts on Monopoly? Fun, too long, too many cheaters? Also, what's the best version of Monopoly you've ever played or dreamt of?
Jon
